Mom is coming to the Closing Ceremonies tonight.
Hopefully it goes okay… she had another heart episode yesterday, with pain this time she told me. [sigh]
She was getting an IV and oxygen when we arrived yesterday with some supper for her. She said she was sitting in her chair waiting for her ride to OT when it happened.
I asked if it would be okay to still take her out today and there were no negative responses so we are going ahead with the plans.
She enjoyed the dinner we took her – leftovers from the roast chicken and Yorkshire Pudding that Jill made for the night before!! It was really delicious.
I spent several hours on the phone yesterday morning and afternoon chasing up information about services and funding available for mom once she’s home and for reno’s to the bathroom and ramps as/if needed. I had to call … all I was given by the hospital social worker was a toll-free number. From there I ended up on the computer and chasing down other agencies myself.
This is quite different from what I was led to believe in the beginning – I was assured that when the time came to discuss mom coming home that I would be provided with all sorts of information etc. That someone would come and assess the house, etc.
Being given one toll-free number doesn’t really fit with what I thought that meant.
Anyhow… from what I’ve learned from the people at the various organizations I managed to find/get numbers for is that we are completely screwed.
1) Home Care does NOT provide someone to stay with mom while I’m at work. I have to HIRE a private agency for that at TWICE what I actually make per hour. Or get family members to help (no one lives here that can do that) and no close friends available to help out.
2) Funding for renovations is income based and we, as a combined family income, are OVER the threshold based on last year’s information. My hours have been cut so much (as of January) that I actually can’t cover the mortgage myself right now, so I am looking for a THIRD part-time job just to keep the house running… oh yeah, the so helpful social worker suggested I could get a second mortgage to do the renovations… did you not hear me say that I wasn’t earning enough right now to cover the first mortgage???? We spent our savings doing the reno’s we just finished – new floors, doors, paint… oh yeah, and I still have to pay for the roof repairs.
3) Once mom is out of the hospital we/she will have to pay for some therapy, prescriptions, etc. In the hospital, it is all covered by her medical insurance, but once out, there is only coverage for certain things, the rest we have to pay out-of-pocket. There are programs available but as we are not considered “low-income” based on last year’s info we probably won’t qualify.
4) Mom’s pension income is not sufficient to cover the cost of the assisted living facilities that are nice and that she was actually looking at herself for a couple of years now – the plan was to sell the house when the market picked up and we’d both go there to live as it was a combined facility. But, that was when I was getting full-time hours at the one job and could supplement the cost of living there with my income.
Gigs are booking and deposits are coming in so that is helping to get the usual bills paid as I go, but I keep having to dip into the reserves which is not good as they will disappear quickly.
I need to get my bookkeeping for last year finished and have a long talk with the accountant about my/our options with the house…
I usually cope pretty well with “stress” but combine all the above with menopause, that I’m getting exhausted with all the running around, trying to find a job that will fit with the other two and be flexible about scheduling, and the possibility of losing my home… just not a fun time right now. I have a permanent headache – chocolate isn’t helping unfortunately.